What employee's says to their employer:

I love my job

I feel guilty working for you because I have so much fun here --- Yet  you quit because your water heater was deducted out of your check (and you worked for us for 3.5 years)

I really want my job.  Please do not fire me.

Why am I getting fired.  I only took drugs once this week.

Why are you giving my accident ticket back to me? I am not paying this. It  was your vehicle and it was not my fault --- Hello Mc Fly, the police officer is the one who said YOU were guilty and gave YOU the ticket. Take it up with them, not us!

Are you going out of business? I have been asking everyone if you are? I heard it from {the guy that was fired} that you are --- Hmmm, should I fire you too for spreading a malicious rumor?

I quit on Thanksgiving Day (after 4 years with the company and no notice) and I may of recrcuited a few of your employees but I am rehireable right?

I am not sleeping with my employee.  He is only staying with me temporarily because he was kicked out of the halfway house.

I'm quiting. It's time for me start up my own business.

I have job offers all the time. You should be happy I still work here because I am happy here.

Why are you telling me what to do. I'm the one in charge. I quit.

I know I quit, but I want you to cut a manuel check because I need the money to go to my new job.

I have given to {insert company name} as much as {insert company name} has given to me.

Do not take Benefits out of my final check. I need the money.

Do not take those garnishments out of my check. I am going to sue you if you do--- really?

Where's my paycheck? --- you have to work to get paid!

Are you firing me? I heard it from {insert employee name} everyday that I am being fired.  He's been telling me this for the past 3 months --- get this, your still here and now that employee left.  Next time, come to us sooner!

I am only paid this much for insurance, so I should not have to pay more than that here -- the last time I checked insurance has gone up every year - that bill is over 3 years old! I wish benefits were cheaper too!

Why are you deducting cell phone fees from my paycheck?  I know I used the phone for personal use but I don't have my own cell phone right now.

I did do side work, but I was not in your vehicle and I did not use your parts ---- okay the only reason your even telling us is because the customer called in to complain about you!  Who do I believe the employee or the customer??? hmmmm how else did he know you worked for us?

More excuses! Click here!